"The Great Bank Robbery of 2005"

The Great Robbery of 2005; Or, a modest proposal for the historical revision of the tales of armed robbery; OR, Book Review: “The best way to rob a bank is to own one.” By William K. Black.



Recently right in the midst of our local bank moving to its new location, a bold, young man strode in and robbed it in broad daylight. Because of the bank relocating, the cameras had been disabled and in the aftermath, the local rumor was that probably the robber would never be caught. Hopes faded for a solution to the crime.

As days passed, the rumor spread that this master of mischief had used such deceit as bandaids on his fingers to do the evil deed. He was rumored to change his clothes as fast as Superman and that he had a lot of tatoos on his back. The number of the tatoos seemed to grow as the days passed.

And then, just when the legend was starting to pick up speed, the robber was caught. By his own large mouth.

It seems that the robber, had spoken to another person while the FBI videotaped his discussion of robbing six banks in four states in seven months. In the process of these crimes, he netted $40,000. If convicted, he faces 20 years in prison for each robbery. Like 120 years in prison for $40,000.

I know what you are thinking----- that this guy just could not do the math. Robbers of earlier days in the 1930s were a lot smarter. Like Jesse James who the folks in Northfield, Minn still celebrate with Jesse James days. Those were the days! Those were the smartest of the smart! Wrong. Nothing has changed. The math was the same or worse in those days of yore. Who then ARE the “ GREATEST “of the bank robbers?…..Read on.

I am currently reading the book, “The Best Way to Rob a Bank is to Own One,” by William K. Black. Mr. Black was the lead regulator during the Savings and Loan Crisis of the 1980’s. In all, over 1000 individuals were convicted of felonies for what is called “control fraud.” This is essentially the white collar version of armed robbery. However, you might be interested to know that nobody counts it as robbery. Huh?

Mr. Black points out in his book that the lessons of the robbery of the S&L’s of the 1980’s has been lost on folks today, and today the same technique is being used to loot corporations. Mr. Black says ,” In 2003, the United States Department of Justice reported that property crimes had continued their trend and fallen to an all-time low. In fact, property crimes have surged to an all-time high since Enron collapsed in late 2001. The reason for the contradiction is that the Justice Department does not count serious crimes because it excludes white-collar crimes from its data keeping. A wave of frauds led by the men who control large corporations, what I term”control fraud,” caused the massive losses from property crimes.”(pp13)

So there you have it. All about the Great Robbery of 2005. Oh, by the way, it wasn’t the guy with the tatoos.